What are friends for

My whole life's been full of people who claimed to be my friends. To them, one time after another I trusted my secrets. Secrets that may not seem that important now as they were when I told them. And those who claimed to be my friends constantly disappointed me. All of them, even if it only was one time, they told my secret. The reason: Someone else wanted to know, or simply they wanted to yell it out loud in the middle of their birthday because it was fun. Every single time I was let down. I tried over and over to convince myself it wasn't that big of a deal that my best friend told a secret I specifically told not to tell.
Kindergarten, primary school, secondary school...
Until one time I met this person. I thought I liked him. I think I did, but everything turned there. I, for once again, trusted someone to tell him one of the biggest secrets I've ever told anyone.
I liked her. I did for a very long time, I may still do it now. And he didn't tell. Not even one person. Not even once. 
He may be rude and let people down a lot of times and be obsessed with the same girl I liked for a long time and even try to be something more than friends with me when I was confused. But he was the first person I've ever told something that big and he kept it as it was, as a secret.
And then there was something else missing. I couldn't talk to him. He was so arrogant sometimes...
All of a sudden someone invited me to have ice-cream. That someone had been acting weird. I thought he liked me. But I was starting something with that internet girl.
That someone just wanted to be my friend. And that girl I liked wanted to be friends too.
And then we, three lonely people were in a new Whatsapp group.
And I started trusting again.
I trusted, and I told them who I was. I told them about that internet girl.
That internet girl put my world upside down.
If you ever saw me just in my phone all day I probably was talking to her.
And then, boom, all ended.
The internet girl and I didnt talk anymore.
I didnt trust that girl i liked or that someone as much as I did before.
And I wanted not to be in this world.
I would be so easy.
Everyone already showed me I could mean less to them.
And that someone stopped me.
People noticed me.
People notice I'd changed.
And they wanted me to be fine.
That's what friend are for.